I have some control issues. I recently was feeling a bit out of sorts because I was not feeling like we were following enough of a routine around here. I was honestly just one laminating trip to Kinkos away from making a huge clip art chart for Finley (really for me) that showed everything we were doing each day. I was spending a lot of time thinking about where to put this chart, what to include, etc. I think I didn't get dressed one day while thinking about it... that was when I stopped and threw what I had started away.
Now, don't get me wrong, I am a big supporter of routines but I am learning that sometimes my happiness is a little too dependent on my own agenda and expectations of how a day, event, activity will go. I'm backing up a bit these days to more of a rough outline and thinking a bit more about not trying to be so in control of so many details...
Tula's out of control hair is my reminder to let go a little, no, a lot.
2 comments:
(I dunno if u remember spanish soo I'll type in english. AND, theres NO way im calling u mrs banks, ms parmley for me)
It's all about perspective I think. If u give it a little bit more thought, u control nothing at all, u cud get killed today, tomorrow, and all ur stress, ur troubles become nothing but the past.Then u see, when stress and problems go away, u think u shud have enjoyed more, so wats the point on stressing off? love and enjoy ur life out! Its hard to realize u got nothing to control, and fear becomes an important factor. Or it might become nothing at all. Its all perspective, not controlling and setting urself free form ur own emotions, its a rough path, but I think it leads to true freedom. Life is a bust and sometimes sad, u only got to do wat u must do, and do it WELL.
Its pretty amazing when a child (or even ur husband) comes into ur life, and teaches u things about urself, Its awesome when u have the capacity of learning from even the hair of ur own child. Life becomes nothing but loving, caring and enjoying, AND (not most importantly, but very important) u grow as a person, and u know ur self better than u did b4. Its just wat love and perspective does to u. Its changes everything, even those parts u always struggled with, it goes deep inside ur heart and blows it upside down, and makes it more beautiful.
Its has been gr8 hearing from u
Daniel Murillo (smartest and most stubbern student u've ever had (jk...))
(ps: I dont have a child lol nor married loll just in case)
You and I are a lot alike! I sit around and think of pretty little picture schedule boards I can make for Clara or for our foster kids. Good for you to realize that it's good to let go of needing to control the routine of the day and even of a certain event or activity. Something I am definitely still learning . . .
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